My Mona

The lady smiles, and dreams of love. I see
a mystery in eyes that look away
at secret scenes in her imagination.

I would that Ada sometimes showered me
with glances that would all my fears allay
without the need for further confrontation.

Alas, I fear that this will never be.
Beloved likes too well to have her say -
which often sends me into hibernation!

This famous portrait was Tess kincaid's choice for her Magpie #59 prompt, and we all know how a lady's smile beguiles!

The Table's Turned!

The picture prompt for Magpie Tales #56 this week gave Mrs.Trellis, under seige by husband Caddoc ideas for turning the tables . . .

Ada: My Cad has "that look" in his eye. My plan will make him wonder why he entertains romantic thoughts. He knows they always come to nought. Does he not know we're into Lent? The calendar has heaven-sent me reasons for point blank refusal. His wrinkled face will show the usual 'downcast, hangdog poor old man.' And think! He'd put ME in the can, locked in the attic on bread and water! A fine to-do, he really oughta know better than to mess with Ada! Now, somewhere here I think that I have laid a clove of garlic by. I'll munch it well, release its juices, show it has alternate uses - it's stronger than a spray of scent! He'll think that means more than is meant, especially if I lower my lashes, add some more enticing splashes of "Lentherique" - that drives him wild. He's such a simple, lovelorn child! But when he comes to steal a kiss I'll fix him with the  fearful hiss of fragrant garlic scented breath. That really should be instant death to all ideas of rumpled sheets and indecorous bawdy treats . . .

Unknown to Ada, Trell was peeking, eavesdropping on her loud self-speaking thoughts which should have remained quiet if Ada did not want a riot on her hands when Caddoc learned he'd likely end with fingers burned!

Trell: Caddoc! Psst! Where are you hiding? Ada is again deriding all your plans for retribution! Come now! What is your solution?

Cad: I'll bide my time till we're beyond Lenten fasting. Though not fond of practising abstemious habits - I'm more inclined to side with rabbits! But if it must be self-denial, I'll look upon this as a trial until I can enjoy a feast, a cornucopia... after Easter!

Revenge Is Sweet?

Thanks to a link on Poet's United Thursday Think Tank, this Norwegian Proverb came to light. It says "Shameful deeds bring on revenge!" Enough said! The story continues... 

Now Caddoc's  plastered, well and truly, we have to wonder- ain't it surely time he had revenge on Ada? More than once she's gladly made a fool of Cad the poor old stick, who can't help being rather thick when he's addled in this fashion by the way she spurns his passion.

Cad enters, hangdog look on face (Ada had called him a disgrace)

Trell:      "Cad, how now? Come be a man! Revenge is needed, Make a plan!"

Cad:        "By jove, I think you 're right! If I give Ada a good fright she may amend her caustic ways...stop saying 'Kindness never pays!'in that acid tone she uses when she finds nothing amuses her, my little lemon drop! I know how I might make her stop! Never mind, Trell, your "I'll be back!"*  l'll stick with "I am alright,Jack!"

Let Ada suffer for a week, so she sees I'm not that meek. I'll feed her bread and watery soup - in the attic - a  ready made coop for my chicken (the clucking old hen!) P'r'aps she'll think 'fore she's nasty again!

* Click on the link above to read what lead to this state of affairs!


And as for the mention of a lemon drop - you might like to read the story HERE ,  if you've not already done so!

Cut To The Quick

Willow's Magpie prompt this week reminded me of a recent incident in Abergele, in the Trellis household.

Scene:  The kitchen of the Trellis house, which seems as quiet as a mouse. Mrs. T. is not in view, so Caddoc won't know what to do when he enters from his shed.

Caddoc:      "Is Beloved still in bed?  Dare I see if there's a chance of early morning dalliance in my Ada's sleepy arms and still-warm-from-her-duvet charms?    
But now he spies the table  there is laid out with her favourite pair of baking tins and bags of flour.

Caddoc:      "It must be the appointed hour when Ada sets herself to bake my favourite lemon flavoured cake. Her baking's really unsurpassed, and now that we are friends at last, I'll help, I will! I'll do my best to grate for her the lemon zest that's needed to impart the flavour. She will be grateful for the favour!

He smiles at this weird play-on-words (which some might think is quite absurd). Then, taking grater from its stand and siezing lemon in one hand, he attacks its yellow, dimpled skin.  He notes the action is akin to stroking his Beloved's face. From this his thoughts drift to the lace that trims her dainty night-time wear. And straightaway a glassy stare comes to his lust besotted eyes as he imagines Ada's ...Cries of pain escape poor Cad. Oh, what a silly, careless lad! Daydreaming of the joys to come he's grated great lumps from his thumb ... 

 

Ada: (from somewhere up the stair)      Caddoc! What's going on down there! I warn you Cad, if you've brought mud in on your boots, I'll have your blood!
Caddoc:      Dearest one, I do declare my blood is flowing everywhere!
Ada:          And if you've spoiled my lemon cake, I swear I'll make your goolies ache!
 (Turns to the audience.)
This isn't normal Ada-speak, but I have had a dreadful week! First my washing came a cropper when Cad chanced, with swinging chopper, to fell the washing pole, the git! He meant a tree to take the hit, but lack of glasses made things blurry, and he mistook it in his hurry. Next, I had my bumper dented- good job the car was only rented.

Now she looks at Cad askance - he has led her such a dance, but blood is spurting from his thumb. She realises what he's done and grabs a first-aid sticky plaster  (no one could have found one faster) and staunched the flow in one fell swoop. 

Ada:       Why are you, husband, such a noop? I leave you to your own devices,  and all your plans turn into crises. 
Caddoc:      At least my gory, red blood-spatter did not fall in our cake batter. And what better outcome could I have mastered, than one in which I end up plastered?!
Trellissimo:  Cad wonders, while the cake is baking, would there be time for some lovemaking? But he despairs when Ada squawks! "Cad, clean those bloody knives and forks!"